


I kind of need a hero (is it you?)

by thekaidonovskys



Series: we found love in a hopeless place [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - BDSM, Collars, Dom Clint Barton, F/M, Gen, M/M, Relationship Negotiation, Sub Phil Coulson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-08
Updated: 2015-05-23
Packaged: 2018-03-29 13:40:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 16,943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3898342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thekaidonovskys/pseuds/thekaidonovskys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the twenty-first century, for gods sake. Phil Coulson does not want to be owned. He just wants to do his job.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first step into the Avengers fandom and the beginning of what I hope will be a long and fun series. I'm very new to this wonderful world so please be kind. Huge thanks to eirwyn my beta and resident Marvel expert who fact checks everything for me - but if anything is canonically wrong, it's my fault (or we can just call it creative license)
> 
> Important series information: This is a D/s AU, canon-compliant with The Avengers, will be semi-compliant with The Winter Soldier when we reach that point, and non-compliant with Age of Ultron or Agents of SHIELD. It also utilizes the beautiful trope of Coulson’s death only lasting a matter of days, and upon recovery he is made the Avengers Liaison. Everything else pertaining to the specifics of this D/s verse should be explained as we go along. Some elements of the D/s AU have been inspired by other works and the general ‘culture’ of the D/s AU - e.g. the ranking system - and others have been made up.

Fury is absolutely living up to his name as he enters Phil's office on Tuesday afternoon. He locks the door behind him, sits down, and slams a piece of paper on the desk. "It's a fucking outrage,” he says.

Phil raises an eyebrow. "What's Barton done this time?" he asks.

"Not him, for once. This is a lot bigger than the Avengers, Phil."

He hands over the piece of paper - it’s from the World Security Council, which automatically means bad news. Phil reads it in silence.

When he puts it down, his hands are shaking. "Is this legal?" he asks.

"You know better than to ask that question. It’s enforceable, that’s all that matters."

"Surely this violates submissives rights, though?"

"They're saying that it's for the benefit of submissives."

Phil snorts. "Fuck that. Firing submissive handlers who are uncollared is for our _benefit_?"

"Apparently you can't be trusted to always be level and focused." Phil opens his mouth to argue and Fury raises a weary hand. "Phil. I know it's bullshit. That's why SHIELD has always had an open hiring policy - we've never discriminated against subs at any level. God knows you worked your way to where you are fair and square, and you’re the most focused agent I’ve got. But my hands are tied. If they're in charge of missions and other agents, and don't have a Dom, they're either demoted or fired."

Phil scrubs a hand across his face. "You say they. You mean me. Being the only submissive handler and all."

Fury just looks at him. "What are you going to do?"

"What can I do? I don't have a Dom - and thanks to the nice little amendment they've put in, it's not like I can just get one of the available ones in SHIELD to 'collar' me. It has to pass review and be deemed a real relationship or else I'll be fired anyway - how the _fuck_ is this enforceable, Nick?"

"I don't know." Fury sighs and stands. "I'll do what I can, Phil, but in thirty days and against the Council, it’s not a lot. Anything you can come up with to keep yourself here, you’ll have my support."

Fury leaves Phil sitting there, staring at his desk. He doesn't know which emotions to feel first.

It's the twenty-first century, for gods sake. Phil Coulson does not want to be owned. He just wants to do his job.

But apparently now he can't do one without the other. Because all the years of hard work he's given, all the feats he's pulled off, the agents he's trained, the lives he's saved - none of it matters anymore because Phil doesn't have someone's collar around his neck.

Submissives have fought for their rights for years now. Phil began his time at SHIELD as a junior agent, back when submissive agents were rare and treated with healthy skepticism - understandably so, since back then many couldn’t stand up to the pressure of not only being a serious minority, but working against stereotypes, society’s beliefs, and cocky Doms who decided they didn’t belong. There are many more these days, society being a better, or at least improving, place, but there are few who have been around for longer than three or four years. Phil is the only one who’s been here for longer than ten.

Phil has never been prepared to let himself be bullied or stereotyped. He’s not just worked his way up the tier, he’s _fought_ , tooth and nail, to prove himself. He’s been very lucky, his rise through SHIELD coinciding with the rise of the submissive rights movement, and opportunities opening for him just when he needed them to, leading him to his current position. And SHIELD is the best place to be an uncollared submissive anyway - as long as you can hold a weapon of some kind and either follow or give orders, nobody gives a shit about your status. In fact, Phil is pretty sure a few of his promotions along the way had been a big ol’ fuck you to some of the bigots trying to impose restrictions on SHIELD; if so, Phil isn’t complaining.

Phil has been damn lucky - but he’s also fought damn hard.

He might be the only submissive handler in SHIELD, but it doesn’t matter. It’s never mattered to his fellow handlers, and any agents who have tried to pull rank and refuse to take his orders have quickly learned what a bad idea that is. His rank, the psychometric-determined number that tells the world exactly how ‘subby’ he is, has been suppressed and classified, but that’s for Phil’s own protection. Some of the archaic laws favouring Dominants have not quite worked their way out of the legal system yet, and submissives ranked ninety and higher - the high range submissive category, in other words - can still be collared by the state for ‘their own protection’. As a Rank 95 submissive, Phil is quite eager to avoid that particular indignity.

Not that the one he’s facing now is much better.

And it’s so stupid that it’s happening now. Because now, as the Avengers Liaison, Phil is nothing short of a _hero_ for submissives rights - he’s the one who gives orders to the six of the strongest and most well known Dominants in the world. None of them have ever batted an eyelid at his status - in fact, they fought for him when others argued. When, at a press conference about the officially formed Avengers Initiative, someone had spoken out about them having a submissive handler, Clint had quietly informed them that if Phil wasn’t allowed to work with them, then good luck surviving the next invasion because Clint sure wouldn’t be coming to their rescue.

(Apparently the rest of the team had been getting ready to speak up in his defense, but the complaints had been withdrawn so fast they hadn’t had a chance to open their mouths.)

Phil’s just as good as any Dominant agent, and better than a lot of them, and he’s never needed a Dom to ‘keep him in line’. Sure, he’s had his struggles - subdrop, distress, all the usual ‘weaknesses’ of a submissive - but Phil’s fought those himself. It might have made life easier to have a Dom, but Phil does not _need_ one.

He’s known that he’s a submissive since the first set of mandatory psychometrics at age twelve; he’s known that he’s a high-ranking submissive since the second set at age sixteen - and he’s known both of those facts, deep down, for a lot longer. After all, the results of the tests are only really a surprise for those who are borderline, and even then it’s rarely shocking. Subs and Doms know who they are from a very young age - neutrals generally work it out once they get into close contact with both and realize they don’t feel like either - and, excluding the rare cases where parents coach their children to try and register them as Dominant instead of neutral or submissive (a very difficult feat, and always spotted), the first set of psychometrics are usually straightforward and simply involve the state registering numbers and determining how many are required for each specialized class the following year.

The second test is often the shocker - it had been for Phil. Even though he’d always known he was particularly submissive, seeing the ninety-five on the page had taken his breath away for a long moment - only four points off the highest submissive score possible. He’d had the option then to begin suppressing his rank and, after a long discussion with his mother, had chosen to do so. Not out of shame - after the shock wore off, Phil had been left with nothing but resignation and understanding - but because they all knew that Phil would never be satisfied as a stay-at-home, or kept, submissive. Of course anybody who hired him would become privy to his rank, but he would be judged on his value as a person before that information was accessible. Submissives rights, still just a fledgling movement at that point, had at least begun making it clear that submissive rankings didn't impact on ones natural abilities and personality traits. Phil could be a stay-at-home submissive, bowing down to a Dom’s every wish with no job, name, or mind of his own (and passes no judgement at all on those who choose that route) but he doesn’t want it. And that’s what matters more - his force of will.

He’s done himself proud. His ability to project neutral - or at least borderline submissive - has earned him respect, responsibility, and independence. And never, in all of the years that Phil has fought for himself, has he ever told himself that having a Dom is a necessity.

That said, there’s a difference between needing a Dom and wanting one. Phil wants a Dom in the same way that all submissives do. It’s been an occasional luxury over the years; weekend play sessions, a few casual relationships, and even a couple of collars in the early days when Phil was just another SHIELD agent. But none of that has ever defined his worth, and that’s exactly how it should be. Phil doesn't want a Dom for the sake of having a collar, or to validate his worth as a person. He wants to be able to stand strong on his own two feet, get by on his own accomplishments and sense of self worth. That's what this anger is about.

But wanting a Dom? Well, yeah, so there might be a Dom that Phil quite wants. A Dom that makes every single submissive part of Phil _sing_ \- but more importantly, a _person_ who makes Phil feel wanted and important. He's not against having a Dom. At least not that one.

But it isn't going to happen. Phil's known that from the start. So he's buried himself in work and stamped down his submissive side and not even entertained the thought of finding a Dom these past eight years. After all, if he couldn't have the Dom he wanted, what was the point in finding another?

And now he's screwed.

Phil would take just about any Dom he could get right now, just to get out of this mess. He'll pass up on the Dom of his deepest desires and take anybody if it means he gets to keep his job. His life.

His Avengers.

***

He arrives home late and heads to the kitchen to grab some dinner. Phil's surprised by the lights being on, and even more surprised to find the entire Avengers team waiting for him. "Everything okay?" Phil asks, immediately on high alert.

Steve nods, clearly the speaker for the group. "We were wanting to talk to you, Phil," he says gently. "Why don't you sit down?"

Phil sits, looking around the assembled faces. They radiate worry, concern, and determination. "Oh," he says. "You've heard, then."

"We have. And, first of all, we're all sorry."

"Sorry?" Tony says. "We're fucking angry, Steve, not sorry. It's disgusting what they're doing."

Phil nods at Tony, who quiets again. "I appreciate it, and I agree. But there's no point in fighting - it won't make matters better. This is enforceable, and it will be enforced." He sighs, absently straightening the folders he's dumped on the table. "I'll spend the next thirty days finding the best replacement I can, and obviously getting out of the tower -"

"Now, hold up a minute," Steve says. "I'm not done. We like you, Phil, and we don't want to see you go. You said we can't fight this one, and you're half right. We can't stop them from kicking you out as an uncollared submissive... but we can change your status."

"How?" Phil asks. He's missing something very important here.

Steve gestures to the six of them. "We all have three things in common - a great deal of bargaining power with SHIELD, a great level of affection for you, and none of us have subs. Plus, we're all rather good at lying. We're all free to offer you our collars, if it means you'll be able to stay."

Phil blinks. He stares for awhile. "You'd... really?"

Steve nods. "I'm willing." He glances around the others. "Guys?"

"It's not the most pure motive for claiming," Bruce says with a shrug. "But it needs to be done. I'm offering too, Phil."

"And we wouldn't actually make you be ours," Tony adds. "It'd just be for show, to let you stay on - at least it would with me. I've got Pepper, after all, and she says she understands, because it's not like she's using the collar, us being unconventional and all.” Phil, despite his shock at the current events, resists the urge to roll his eyes. Tony proclaims the unconventionality of dating a fellow Dom any chance he gets, when really it’s hardly an unusual thing anymore. “Anyway,” Tony continues, “I'm in."

"I am still uncertain how this claiming ritual works, Son of Coul," Thor booms. "But I too will offer the symbolic collar of ownership."

Bruce clears his throat. “I should mention that we’re not entirely sure if Thor can actually offer with the whole being royalty from another world thing. And he hasn’t had a chance to get a hold of Jane yet to run it by her, but she likes you too, Phil. I don’t see her complaining.”

Phil looks to Natasha and Clint. Natasha rolls her eyes. "You know I don't even go in for this bullshit," she says. "Means nothing to me. If I need to put a bit of leather around your throat to keep you on the team, I'll do it."

Clint just smiles at him. "Do you even need to ask, Phil?" he says quietly. "How many times have you saved my life now? It'd take another eight years for me to learn to trust a new handler. My collar is there too, if you choose it."

Phil looks down at the table, choked up. It takes a few moments for him to blink tears away and swallow the lump in his throat. "Thank you," he murmurs. "I can't - not right now. I need some time to think. But this means so much."

Steve pats him on the shoulder. "You're welcome, Phil. Let us know when you decide, and who you decide if you do."

There's a general exodus then, people finding other places to be. Thor's asking questions about collaring as he leaves with Tony, and Natasha and Bruce are quibbling over something, Steve stepping in to add his opinion after a moment.

Clint pauses at his side and lets his hand rest on Phil's shoulder for a moment. "I'm sorry you can't fight this on your own," he says. "I know your independence matters - and none of us think any less of you because you have to take a collar to stay. But we'll fight with you. You're not going anywhere."

Phil keeps staring at his hands, but he knows Clint can see his smile. "Thank you," he says.

Clint squeezes his shoulder, then lets go and leaves. Phil can hear him a few moments later joining in with Tony and Thor's discussion.

Phil just sits for a minute in quiet contemplation, then gets up and starts preparing dinner. The world has to go on, after all, even if he has to make one of the biggest decisions of his life in the next thirty days.

***

Of course Phil's going to take one of them up on their offer. This is exactly what he’d been praying for, for a Dom to step out of the woodwork and offer to help. Phil might not have expected it to be the _Avengers_ , but then he hadn’t expected any of these events to occur. Everybody’s just doing what they can to try and get back to their level of normality - which, yes, resulted in six separate collaring offers in the space of a minute. Phil should consider himself lucky under any standards; and he does. Immensely.

The problem is working out who.

It should be obvious. The collar of the man he loves is one of those being offered, Phil should jump at that. But the spirit of the offer - necessary, out of obligation - is upsetting. This isn't because he's wanted as a submissive, but because the team want to keep him. Which, in itself, is gratifying and comforting, and Phil should just be satisfied with that and take one of the collars and not let it matter.

In fact, two of the collars in particular would make the whole process seem incredibly real - agents who work closely for years on end do often end up in relationships. Natasha and Clint have been his agents for several years now, and they’ve gone through life-or-death situations. And while most of SHIELD knows that Natasha Romanov is permanently off the market by her choice and probably wouldn’t believe her collaring Phil, Clint is another story altogether. If Phil were to accept Clint's collar, it would seem realistic and have much more chance of passing the review.

Easy. Clint's collar it is.

But not quite that easy. Because Phil is completely in love with Clint, and if Phil accepts Clint's collar, it will mean something to him that it doesn't to Clint.

Phil doesn't know if his heart can handle that. But hell, he doesn't know if he can handle turning it down either. Clint might not be offering out of love, but kindness and compassion count too - and really, how can Phil say no?

But how can Phil say yes and accept the collar with the knowledge that it means so little?

Phil shakes his head and returns to his paperwork. He's been rolling this around in his head for days, and he's still no closer to ending the mental debate. He needs to soon, though - whoever he chooses needs to provide a contract and collar, and be sufficiently prepared to fake being his Dom at review - but right now it's too hard to think about.

He’s tossed up a few ideas on narrowing down his decision - spending time with each member of the team to see who he could fake a relationship best with, discussing it with Director Fury (of course he’s going to know it’s fake), or just picking a name out of a hat and being done with it. Nothing feels _right_ , though.

But if Phil’s waiting around on it to feel right, he’s got a long wait ahead. None of this is _real_. He’s going to put someone’s collar on, and all it will be is a piece of leather that keeps him in his job. Nothing else will change, and the difficulties he’s experiencing in thinking the issue over are just nerves and worry about the review. That’s all.

Except.

Well, when it really comes down to it, he knows why it's so hard to think about, and it’s got nothing to do with faking his love for somebody at a review.

It’s because he's already decided.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a moment of silence. "So that means -" Bruce begins, then goes quiet. 
> 
> Phil takes a deep breath and turns to Clint. His heart is beating way too fast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The support and love on the first chapter has been astounding, thank you so much. I was asked why this fic only has three chapters - this is the first fic in a series that so far has seventeen instalments planned and doesn't seem to be slowing down, so there's definitely a lot more to come. I hope you enjoy it!

Nearly a week after the offers, Phil calls everybody to the living room and stands in front of them. It feels just like any other Avengers meeting, but it’s far from just an average debriefing, and Phil tries to keep himself calm as he looks at each person in turn. He catches Clint’s eye last, receives a raised eyebrow of query and concern, and looks away.

He’s so not ready for this.

"Thank you all for coming," Phil says. "After much deliberation, I've made my decision to take one of you up on your very kind offer of collaring. I don't want to leave the team, and it means a lot that you don't want me to either. I wish we could fight this properly, but this is one of those times when I just have to submit…” he pauses, shaking his head, and Clint and Natasha both chuckle. “Well, there it is in a nutshell,” Phil says dryly.

"Who are you picking?" Bruce asks.

Phil hesitates. "Before I do... I know this isn't - your offers aren't made out of actually wanting me as yours. But I feel like I should explain why I haven't chosen the rest of you, just to make it clear that I'm not rejecting any of you out of any sense of dislike. There is logic; and there’s also protocol for accepting and rejecting collaring offers… and you all know what I’m like with protocol. I want to do this properly.”

"Fire away," Tony says.

"I'll start with you then," Phil says, and Tony laughs. "Thank you for your offer, Tony, but you have Pepper. Not only would that be very hard to explain and justify to a review board, but I just don't feel right having a Dom who has somebody else. Same goes for all of you," he adds. "If I end up with someone who later wants a real sub, I'll happily dissolve the contract."

There are nods all around. "Understood," Tony says. "And thanks. Rejected but not dejected, and offer withdrawn.”

Phil smiles, then turns to Thor, who stands. "Thank you for your offer, Thor, but again, there's Jane to consider. I also checked with Director Fury, and even though you’ve passed the basic psychometric and been registered as low-level Dominant, you can't legally take a Midgardian as your submissive and have it recognised as valid in a court of law. At least not for our purposes - this, of course, won’t stop you from collaring a submissive if you ever choose to, though with Jane being a neutral, I don’t think that’s something you’re considering."

Clint quickly stands and murmurs in Thor’s ear. "Then I withdraw my offer and accept your kind rejection," Thor says with a respectful nod, and sits back down.

Phil nods his thanks to Clint - it isn’t exactly necessary to stick with the formal words for accepting Phil’s rejection, but both the submissive and the detail-obsessive in Phil feel a lot better knowing that he’s ended everything properly and fully. He looks at Natasha next. "Thank you for your offer, Natasha,” he begins formally, following the protocol like all the others, then stops and smirks. “You know why I’m saying no. I wouldn't do that to you - owning a sub is distasteful to you, even if it is just for show. Besides, my preferences make the idea of having a Domme rather distasteful to me, even if it is just for show."

She smiles. "Thanks, Phil. Rejection gladly received and offer withdrawn.”

The easy ones done, Phil sighs and turns to Bruce. "Thank you for your offer, Bruce, but you made the comment that this didn't feel 'pure' to you. I would feel bad about tying you down to something you weren't comfortable with."

"I wouldn't be uncomfortable," Bruce argues. "But I'm a bit of a romantic at heart, is all. I’ve only ever had one submissive and - well. We don’t need to rehash that.”

"I know. I might be doing this out of need, but I don’t want to impose on anybody either. And also, I just don't think it would be a good fit, no matter how much it is just for show. I know you’d give it your best, but I don’t see us passing a review together. Sorry."

"Hey, no sweat," Bruce says easily. "Didn't think you'd choose me, I'm not offended. Rejection accepted, offer withdrawn.”

"Does anybody else feel like we're watching The Bachelor right now?" Tony asks, and turns to look at Steve and Clint. "The final two. Who's it gonna be? You need roses, Phil!"

Phil rolls his eyes. "As minimally dramatic as possible, thanks, Tony."

"Oh, fine. It's obvious anyway, isn't it? Biggest Captain America fanboy ever, and Captain America is offering to collar him. Like that wasn't your favourite special dream when you hit puberty."

"Tony, shut up," Natasha says.

Phil just rolls his eyes. "Ignoring the last part of that, Tony's right. I was embarrassingly obsessed, and everybody here knows it.” He still remembers bringing Steve in to join the Avengers, and tries not to let the heat rise to his face as he recalls his comments. Thankfully they’re long past that point now. But still... “That's why I'm declining your offer, Steve. I can see it causing tension between us. I value your friendship, and I don't want to make this into... well, what Tony said. But _not_ what Tony said."

"I understand," Steve says with a smile. "I accept your rejection and won't take it personally. I withdraw my offer too.”

There's a moment of silence. "So that means -" Bruce begins, then goes quiet.

Phil takes a deep breath and turns to Clint. His heart is beating way too fast. "Thank you for your offer, Clint," he says quietly. "If it is still open, I would like to accept it."

Clint doesn't speak for a moment, then slowly stands. "You’ve thought about the fact that you’re my handler?" he asks. “I’m not withdrawing my offer, but is this going to change anything? Because you know how I feel about handlers that aren’t you.”

"It won't change," Phil assures him. "In fact, it seems the most natural. We've spent so much time together on missions, the review board are more likely to accept a bond forming between us. Granted, it’s the opposite way around, but you’ve never had any problems telling me what to do even when I’m the one supposed to be giving the orders."

Clint concedes that with a nod. "Well, then," he says. "Should I collar you now?"

Phil's emotions are in turmoil at that sentence, dreamt of for so long yet uttered so casually. "If you have a collar ready - but there's no hurry. I know this is far more rushed than normal or advisable. If you need time to think about it..."

"Nothing to think about," Clint says with a small smile. "It's hurried, but we all knew it had to be that way, and it's not like I don't already know you pretty damn well. I do have a collar - I'll go get it. Will you all bear witness?"

The group assents, and Clint leaves. While he's gone, Phil takes off his tie, undoes the first two buttons of his shirt, and puts a cushion in the middle of the floor. Then he gets out his phone and pulls up the collaring vows he's researched. It keeps his hands from shaking.

When Clint returns, box in hand, Phil gives him the phone. "These are the most simple I could find," he says. "No 'till death do us part', no 'obey', nothing that locks us into more than we're willing to give."

Clint reads them, then nods. "I like it. Simple and to the point. Who wants to read them?"

Natasha steps forward. "Allow me," she says.

Phil starts to kneel, but Clint stops him. "Look at it first," he says, and opens the box. "I know this isn't... but I still want you to like it. There's time to get a different one if you don't."

Phil takes in the collar. It's a deep purple, the shade muted but still striking. The small bronze plate has an arrow on it - of course - and Phil smiles. "It's lovely, Clint," he says honestly. "I'll be glad to wear it."

Clint smiles too. "Good. Okay, down you go."

Phil rolls his eyes, but obediently settles himself on the cushion in the formal kneel. It’s been a long time since he’s had to use it, so he spent some time this afternoon practicing and is confident that he’s got his posture and positioning perfect. No matter how little this means to Clint, Phil wants to look the part. He's taking the collar of the man he loves, after all.

When he looks up, Clint's eyes are curiously wide. Phil holds eye contact, and, through the benefit of years of experience and training, reads Clint’s emotions. He’s been Clint’s handler for eight years now, has seen him display just about every emotion possible, and where anybody else would just see mild surprise, Phil can read…

Wait.

What _can_ he read?

Well, there’s shock. That much is obvious. But it isn’t bad shock it’s… good? And there’s amazement, absolute wonder, something Phil only sees when someone shocks Clint down to the core by doing something completely unexpected - either very good, or very bad. But he’s guarded too, uncertain, trying to hold back out of fear of -

Rejection.

Because Clint’s staring at Phil, kneeling at his feet, like he can’t believe the universe has put him here; but he’s also staring at him in fear because, as far as Clint’s concerned, the universe has put Phil here out of obligation and not…

Not for the same reasons Clint wants him to be here.

Clint _wants him to be here._

Phil blinks twice, then _smiles_.

And it only takes a second - the same second - for Clint to read him in return, and Clint breaks out into the most beautiful smile that Phil has ever seen. Phil instinctively reaches for Clint's hand, Clint squeezing his fingers tight, and there's _everything_ in Clint's eyes and -

And this is suddenly all very, very real.

Natasha lightly clears her throat. If Phil were to look at her now, he’d see her smiling too, and the look in her eyes would be something along the lines of _well about fucking time_. But he only has eyes for Clint, and Clint for him. "Clint,” Natasha says quietly, “if you'll repeat after me?"

She reads the vows and Clint recites them. Phil doesn't hear a word, nor does he pay attention to his own voice when it's his turn. His mouth says all the promises of belonging to Clint and wearing his collar and accepting him as his Dom; his eyes tell another story. No - the same story, but told in emotions rather than words.

So do Clint's. Phil can hardly believe what he's seeing - Clint wants this, just as much as he does.

When Phil finishes the vows, Clint picks up the collar and sinks to his knees in front of Phil. There's nothing more that's required, apart from putting it on, but Clint still pauses. "Will you wear my collar, Phil?" he asks.

"Yes," Phil says softly. "Gladly, and freely."

"And I give it freely," Clint says.

These are the real vows. They both know it.

Clint slips the collar around his neck and fastens it in place. Then he rises and holds out a hand, helping Phil to his feet.

Steve starts the applause. Phil rolls his eyes, then smiles. He’s still adjusting to the feel of leather around his throat, something he hasn’t had in a long time, and hopefully the slight choke to his voice when he speaks can be blamed on that. "Thanks, guys," he says. "And thank you for all of your offers. I won't forget it."

"What happens now?" Bruce asks. "You get to stay?"

"Not definitely. Now I fill in the required paperwork, and then Clint and I are submitted to a review to determine the validity of our relationship. If we pass, then I get to stay."

Clint takes his hand. "We should talk about all of that," he says, and picks up the empty collar box. "If you'll excuse us?"

The lift ride is silent, but electric. Phil meets Clint's eyes once, and his gaze is intoxicating. Phil returns it, then looks down - if he keeps his eyes on Clint, he's going to throw himself across the lift at him, and he can't do that. Not until they've talked.

Not until he's positive.

When they reach Clint's room, Clint locks the door, drops the box on the table, and turns to Phil with impossibly wide eyes. "I didn't just imagine that, did I? What I saw in your eyes... that was real?"

"It was," Phil says, and his voice is shaky. "I meant what I said - this isn't out of obligation, not for me. It never was, not when it comes to you."

"Oh my god, Phil," Clint whispers. "You wanted this? To be mine for real?"

"So much. But I never thought you'd want me."

"I do. Always have. Not even... I mean, I know you never wanted a Dom, never felt like you should have to have one - and you don't. You don't need a Dom to be amazing. But if you hadn't wanted me as a Dom, I would've wanted you as a partner anyway. I need you to know that."

Phil ducks his head a little. "I want you as a partner. But I want you as my Dom too. I'm not anti-Dom, I just never found the right one to fit with my needs. And then I did, but I never thought you'd feel the same."

"I do," Clint promises. "God, I was shaking so hard when I came up here to get the collar. I didn't know how I was going to keep it together and pretend this was just a friend doing you a favour."

"I tried to tell myself not to choose you. That it would only hurt me, to wear your collar and not have you feel the same. I'm glad I didn't have self restraint."

Clint laughs, a little breathless. "So am I, Phil. I can't believe I actually get this - get _you_. Can I kiss you?"

"Yes. Please."

Clint threads a hand in his hair and kisses him, hard and possessive. Phil whines low in his throat, and it's so simple to cede power to Clint, to let him take control and lead the kiss - and this is what submission is about for Phil. He spends his days projecting neutral and standing his ground against some of the toughest Dominants in the field, and the idea of coming home to this, to be able to give over control to his Dom and let Clint tell him what to do... it's intoxicating. It's what he wants.

For the first time, Phil stops cursing those damn rules that made this necessary. They've brought him Clint, and he will never regret this.

***

Eventually they end up lying together on Clint's bed. They're both fully clothed, and Phil is pretty sure sex isn't on the cards for tonight, not while Clint keeps stroking his hair so softly. He's not complaining - this is exactly what Phil wants right now, especially since it’s so easy to just be _here_ with Clint, every kiss and soft touch coming so naturally to them both. It’s as if he’s been Clint’s forever.

In many ways, he has.

Clint's hand dips a bit lower to brush over the collar. "You look incredible in this," he murmurs.

"It's beautiful. When did you design it?"

"When I first started at SHIELD. It wasn't that I had anybody in mind - though I did think my handler was cute." Clint winks and Phil ducks his head a little, smiling. "It was just that I had the money and the freedom to, so I did. And then it sat in my closet for eight years."

"I'm the first to wear it?"

"I've had other subs," Clint amends quickly. "But before SHIELD. So the collars were cheap, store-bought, whatever I could scrounge up. You're the first to wear my custom collar."

"I'll do my best to live up to the honour bestowed upon me," Phil says, then winces. "Sorry. That was... subby."

"Shh, I don't mind." Clint smiles at him, so fond and sweet. "You are a sub, Phil. I know you don't show it a lot with your job and all that, and I want you to feel free to be however you want around me - whether that means you need plenty of equal treatment, or if you just need to let go completely. However you need to be is fine, and we'll talk about it more another day. But I did want to ask; how… well, subby are you? I mean, you know my ranking, but yours is classified."

Phil looks down. "For good reason." He sighs, knowing he shouldn't be embarrassed, but it's always hard to admit, and even harder to admit to Clint who, up until tonight, has only ever seen him projecting neutral. "Ninety-five,” Phil murmurs.

Clint's hand stills. "Ninety-five," he repeats. "Holy hell, Phil. I had you pegged at about an eighty."

"When you rank that low, you tend to project as high as you can. Especially if you're an uncollared high level SHIELD agent and the state still has the power to forcibly collar you or take away your work rights. Are you regretting this?"

"What? No, god no. Just wondering if I'm actually going to be enough for you. Don't you need an Alpha?"

Phil tries not to let that sting. "No," he says. "But if you'd rather find one you can hand me over to -"

"Oh, shit," Clint says, and draws his hand out of Phil's hair to cup his cheek. "No, Phil, honey, I'm not saying anything like that. But this is... it's real. You and me, we're really doing this. And I want you to be free to submit to the level you want and the level you're at. I never want you to suppress your submissive needs because I'm not dominant enough for you. There's nothing wrong with you, okay? It's me I'm worried about."

Phil rubs his cheek against Clint's hand, and refuses to feel ashamed about the gesture. "You're plenty dominant for me," he says. "You're not high level enough that you feel cocky about it, and I know you're going to treat me right. That's all that matters. And I'll tell you something that I probably shouldn't, but I will anyway."

"What?"

"Out of everybody who offered me their collars, you rank the highest."

Clint blinks. "What? But I'm only an eleven."

Phil wants to laugh at that. Alpha Doms rank one through ten, meaning Clint is as borderline as it gets. Only a eleven indeed. "There are no Alphas on the team. You're the closest."

“Steve?”

Phil debates sharing it, then remembers that Steve’s rank is public record. “Fifteen. Still pretty high, and obviously he can call on the Alpha traits if the situation really calls for it, but a lot of that is just charisma. I’d say your independence and... lack of enthusiasm about taking orders, is probably what ranks you higher.” Phil doesn’t talk about the times he’s seen Clint straight out of battle, fierce and strong and proud and every inch the Alpha Dom. He’d probably make a bit of an idiot of himself if he had to put his instinctive response to that into words.

"Oh." Clint processes that, then nods. "Is that why you chose me?"

Phil groans. "Clint. I picked you because I want _you_. I couldn't care less about your rank. How can I make that clear?"

"You don't need to," Clint soothes. "I'm sorry. I'm still having a hard time believing this is real. Give me a few days."

"I understand." Phil presses a feather-light kiss to Clint's wrist, and Clint traces his thumb across Phil's cheekbone. "What do you want to tell the others, by the way? I think they probably noticed that we got a bit... intimate."

"Nat definitely picked up on it, but she has the benefit of having me complaining to her for four years about how badly I want you." Phil laughs and Clint smiles, kissing his forehead quickly before continuing. "If you're comfortable with telling the others, we'll tell them. I'm sure it won't change things - nobody's doubted your authority before, and if anybody starts coming to me trying to get my approval to take orders from you they'll get a loud talking to."

"Thank you. Will you kiss me again?"

"With pleasure, sweetheart." Clint moves to do so, but Phil stops him, smiling slightly too much to focus on kissing right now. "What?" Clint asks.

"The pet names. Instinctive for you?"

"Yeah." Clint's blushing. "Are they a problem? I can work on toning it down."

Phil shakes his head. "Far from it. Makes me feel... cherished." And that’s embarrassing to admit, but hell, if Clint’s blushing, he might as well join him. There’s wonderful strength in shared vulnerability, and Phil wants this relationship as strong as it can be. He wants everything from Clint - including being cherished.

"Good. That's exactly how I want you feeling." Clint kisses him, then pulls away. "I'm going to send you on a task now. Go to your room, pack up an overnight bag, and bring it back here. I want you in my bed tonight - unless you have any objections?”

“None.”

“Go on then.”

Phil goes without another word. He gets pyjamas, toothbrush, gym clothes, and fresh clothes together without any fuss, then pauses and looks around. After a minute of deliberation, he adds his tablet and laptop and closes the bag - Clint said overnight, but he didn't specify what kind of night, so Phil just goes with the basics, explaining as such to Clint when he returns. "If you want anything in particular that I need anything for, I can go back and get it," he says.

Clint smiles. "There's nothing else you need," he says. "We have discussions and negotiations and a contract to write and I have so many things to learn about you and us and we need to prepare for the review - and all of that can wait until tomorrow. Tonight I just want to hold you. Is that okay?"

"I can't think of anything better."

Clint kisses him softly. "I'm usually up at about five for early range practice. I know you like to leave here at seven to get to the office, but if you want to sleep in later than me you're very welcome to."

Phil shakes his head. "I'm usually in the gym when you're on the range."

"Really? I never see you."

"I see you," Phil says, and deliberately lets his eyes trail down Clint's arms.

Clint laughs, but he also looks so damn pleased. "Maybe it's good that I can't see you working out," he says. "Might not be able to aim straight."

"I don't know if I'd be that distracting."

Clint shamelessly looks him up and down. "Oh yes you would be."

Phil blushes. "May I kiss you?" he asks.

Clint nods, then holds up a hand. "No, hang on. You haven't kissed me without asking yet - is that a thing you like or a thing you think you have to do?"

"The latter, just to be on the safe side. Some Doms like to be asked first."

"I'm not one of them. Kisses don't require permission; nor do they need to be earned, by the way. Obviously there's a time and place for everything, but if you want to kiss me, sweetheart, you go ahead and do so. They're on my list of three things I will never restrict or take away in punishment."

"What are the other two?"

"Food and hugs. Most other things are fair game - negotiation and hard limits aside, and we'll discuss all that in coming days - but more harm than good comes of taking any of those things from a sub. I don't want you to feel that my affection is based on good behaviour."

"Or food."

"Or food," Clint agrees. "Food restriction is just needlessly cruel. And I try hard not to be cruel."

"I don't think you're capable of cruelty. I see you being stern when necessary but..."

"But?"

"Sweet," Phil says, blushing a little. "And kind. Always kind."

"I do my best," Clint says softly. "If I ever treat you in a way that feels cruel to you, I'll dissolve the contract myself."

Phil shakes his head and draws closer to Clint. "We don't even have a contract yet - please don't talk about dissolving it."

"Sorry, honey." Clint kisses him softly. "Having you here in my arms is by far my biggest dream come true - I don't plan on letting you go any time soon."

Phil nuzzles his neck, and Clint strokes his hair. "Mine too," Phil murmurs into his skin. "I've wanted you for so long, and I'm here for as long as you'll keep me."

He doesn't feel like moving, and Clint makes no move to push him away. So Phil stays, only feeling faintly embarrassed about the need to nuzzle - it's subby as hell, but Clint's promised he likes Phil subby, and Phil trusts him.

Eventually he lifts his head, and Clint smiles softly at him. "Too early to call it a night?"

"Definitely not."

"Good. You take the bathroom first."

Phil does, slightly grateful that Clint's instructed him to get changed in another room. It might seem a bit pointless to be this modest around someone who now essentially owns him, and someone he'll definitely be having sex with in the very foreseeable future, but Phil likes it, likes getting to know his Dom as well as he can before jumping into bed with them. And while they certainly don't need a contract for vanilla sex, Phil likes to have all the details ironed out beforehand, and he knows Clint knows that.

More reasons to be in love with Clint. Phil hopes the reasons never stop coming.

He gets ready quickly, then heads for Clint's room. "Do you have a side you prefer sleeping on?" he asks as he enters, then frowns when Clint turns and stares. "What?"

"Oh, you're adorable," Clint says softly. “We’ve done the safe house thing so many times and I’ve never let myself just… look.”

Phil blushes, but he’s smiling. “Neither. Well… not overtly.” Clint chuckles and Phil ducks his head a little. "Side?" he asks.

"I prefer the left, unless you're partial."

"I'm not." Phil heads to the right hand side and gets in, only to find Clint staring again. "Are you the type of Dom that makes me wait to get in bed?" he asks.

"Hm? No, no way, and I hate to think of the reasoning behind that. No, I'm just enjoying the sight of you in my bed."

"Well," Phil suggests, "if you go and get ready for bed, you can enjoy it up close."

Clint chuckles. "An excellent suggestion. Back in a minute."

Phil makes himself comfortable while he waits, and can't stop himself from flat out grinning when Clint emerges. "Cute as hell," he informs him.

Clint rolls his eyes, flicks off the main lights, and joins Phil in bed. "How cuddly are you?" he asks.

Phil laughs. "Oh, insanely."

"That's what I wanted to hear."

Clint switches the lamp off, then reaches out for him. Phil draws close, easily settling in to Clint's arms. "You feel like home already," he murmurs against Clint's neck. Clint doesn't reply for a second, and Phil worries. "Too fast?"

"No way," Clint says, sounding a little choked up. "No, just... you. Being here. It's wonderful." He chuckles then, and begins tracing his fingers across Phil's back. "Sorry. I'm being silly."

"No you're not. Or, if you are, I am too."

Clint hums. "This is so far from where I thought my day would end when I woke up in this bed this morning. Hell, I didn't even know you were choosing a collar today."

"I only decided this afternoon. Even then, I thought I'd be in my bed, alone, with your collar but without you."

"That's an awful image. Forget it. You're here, with my collar and very much with me, and you're going to fall asleep in my arms."

"Is that an order?" Phil asks, smirking a little.

Clint chuckles. "Would you say no if it was?"

"No, 'cause I'm a good sub," Phil informs him, then yawns.

"Yes you are, sweetheart," Clint murmurs. "You go to sleep. I'll see you in the morning."

"Okay. Goodnight Clint."

"Goodnight Phil."

Phil goes to sleep in Clint's arms praying that he only wakes up from one set of dreams in the morning.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really bad at remembering to reply to reviews (though I do read and appreciate every single one) - if you want to ask questions or chat, come find me at clintcoulsons on tumblr


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I want to get as many things right with you as I possibly can. There'll be mistakes and miscommunications and it won't always be wonderful, and that's because we're both human. But I'm going to do my best to make you as happy and well-kept as I can."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is long and full of communication/negotiation. It may be tedious for some people - personally I have such a thing for long negotiation periods and characters talking out all the important details, but you can pretty safely skim a lot of the second half without missing much if you don’t care for that in the same way.
> 
> Various warnings for the negotiation scene - there'll be discussions around painplay, hard limits, and other general issues. I don't think there's anything particularly strong, but if you know you have a trigger that might come up in a BDSM negotiation scene, please be aware and careful.

Phil walks into Fury's office the next day, places the forms on his desk, then undoes his tie and top two buttons to reveal Clint's collar. “Will this suffice?” he asks.

Fury eyes it up, looks at the forms, and nods. "Looks fine. Barton’s your most realistic choice anyway - but can you two pull it off at the eval?"

Phil smiles and tries not to let it go sappy. "I think so," he says as neutrally as possible.

Fury signs the form, then frowns at Phil. "Oh," he says after a minute. "No, I know that look. Seen it a hundred times the day after leave was given for a collaring ceremony. You've done this for real?"

Clearly Phil’s efforts to keep his smile in check have failed. "It was as much of a shock to us as it is to you," Phil says. "But yes. Turns out he wanted me after all."

He really doesn't mean to say that, but Fury just nods. "Always wondered why you two weren't together," he says as he seals up the forms and drops them in the mail box. "Who witnessed?"

"All the Avengers."

"Good. Nobody's going to doubt Rogers' testimony." Fury pulls up Phil's files, flicks his status to collared (and wow does that simple action do stupid things to Phil’s heart), and begins filling in Clint’s details. "As far as I'm concerned, you can head back to work."

"Thank you, sir."

But Phil stays where he is until Fury looks up, eyebrow raised. "Problem?"

"Is this solving the issue, or just slapping a band-aid over something bigger?"

"What are you asking?"

"I'm the only submissive agent at this level," Phil says. "I'm also the Avengers Liaison. Interesting that they've found an angle that only impacts me. Who was going to take over my job if I didn't find a Dom?"

"I don't know. I didn't ask, because I didn't want to know."

Phil nods. "You've had the same thoughts, then."

"They're always up to something, Phil. I'd honestly like to believe that they're just misguided bigots, but I also think they've always seen the Avengers as a weapon that SHIELD can wield at any time, and you're officially the one who has control over them."

"And they think having a submissive in charge of them isn't safe? That I'm too weak to command -"

Fury snorts. "Weak? You? Phil, you're too strong to be in charge of them, because you'd never allow yourself to be corrupted by the Council. They want someone who'll listen to their suggestions of forced implant tracking or running dangerous tests on Dr. Banner or any of the other things you'd refuse to contemplate. And they're grasping at straws to try and get you out, even though the Avengers would more likely break free and do their own thing if you got kicked out. That's their angle here, as far as I can see. They don't give a shit that you're a sub, they just see it as something they can try to use to get you out and get someone in who they can manipulate."

"Oh," Phil says quietly - because yeah, he knows he's a good agent, but he never realized he was actually a threat on a political level. He tends to try to stay out of SHIELD politics, his focus on making sure his agents do a good job and save lives like they’re meant to, instead of getting caught up on who to keep in favour with. Phil doesn’t want to be anybody’s tool to be wielded at will, and that’s part of the reason he’s gotten as far as he has; he’s never let anybody treat him that way.

He’s not going to start now. The review, already personal, is now even more so, and Phil is going to pass it no matter what.

Thank god for Clint’s genuine care.

"Either way, it doesn't matter," Fury says, returning his attention to the screens. "You're not going anywhere except back to work."

“Thank you, sir,” Phil says again, and this time departs.

Clint's waiting outside, and falls into line as they head for Phil's office. "All good, boss?"

There’s a lot Clint’s asking there, and Phil offers the blandest of smiles that he knows Clint can read assurance in. "Still the review to pass, but Director Fury isn't limiting my duties. He's satisfied with the validity."

"Great." They reach Phil's office and Clint stops for a moment. "Okay, I'm off to shoot some things."

Phil rolls his eyes. "Very technical, Barton. Please make sure they're all targets."

"Anything can be a target, sir." Clint smirks and Phil sighs, trying not to smile. "What time are you finishing tonight?"

"Five?"

"Good. I'll be here at five. Or thereabouts."

"I won't hesitate to leave without you if you're not there."

Clint snorts. "As if you'll be ready then. There's always 'just one more email' to send."

Phil shooes him away. "Go train, Barton. If I don't see you before five, it'll be a miracle."

"Best behaviour, boss," Clint says with a salute, and heads off.

Phil closes his door, smiling softly. He never thought he’d be glad to have Clint Barton acting like a brat, but it’s so nice to see that some things never change.

***

The team is called together for their weekly meeting that night - they generally have a debrief once a week, in which Phil passes on any paperwork, files, R&D requests to Tony, and any other information that’s come up and isn’t time sensitive. Phil takes them through it, just like normal, and it's clear that nothing has changed here either. The team still treat him with the same deferential respect - including Clint, who bows to his authority when they're on the clock with a quiet "Yes, boss," when Phil reminds him about his paperwork from the last mission.

When they're done, Phil asks everybody to stay for a moment longer, then nods to Clint. "After our collaring ceremony last night," he begins, as Clint stands and comes to join him, "Clint and I spoke about the nature of our relationship and... and what the ceremony brought out in us."

He turns to Clint, who easily takes over. "Turns out Phil and I have quietly pined for each other for years now -"

"Quietly?" Natasha says with a smirk. "Nothing quiet about your complaining, Barton."

Clint rolls his eyes. "My point is, the collar is no longer simply out of necessity to keep Phil here. It's now a true symbol of the fact that Phil has done me the honour of becoming my submissive, and we're sort of crazy about each other."

Phil can't stop the stupid smile that forms at that, and Clint wraps an arm around his shoulders, pressing a kiss to his cheek. "We thought you should know," Phil says. "But it doesn't change anything. We won't be particularly public about our relationship, and while we're on the clock, I'm still in charge."

"Of course," Steve says with a nod. "Congratulations to the two of you. I've never seen you look happier."

"You might in a minute," Phil says quietly.

Clint frowns. "What?"

Phil steps away, over to his briefcase. His heart is pounding, but Natasha catches his eye and gives him a small nod. She's the one he asked about making this a public gesture, after all, and she's confident that this will go down well, no matter how terrifying it is for Phil to do. These are the people he’s spent a good few years being carefully neutral around and doing his best to be submissive without being submissive.

But he’s going to do this and he’s going to do it right. Clint has publicly claimed Phil both yesterday and tonight - Phil wants to offer something in return. So Phil pulls the small box out of his case and turns back to Clint, holding it out. He’s considered kneeling for this, but having been on his knees once in front of the team in the past twenty-four hours, he’s not too keen about doing it again. He doesn’t need them to get used to seeing that - Phil is still the same Agent Coulson he’s always been.

He does at least bow his head. "Having accepted your collar," he says quietly to Clint, "I offer you my ring."

He opens the box to reveal his ring - the equivalent of Clint’s collar, but, unlike the collar, entirely voluntary for him to offer or for Clint to accept. A lot of submissives don’t have them anymore; it’s a little old-fashioned, though Phil has never understood why something that involves publicly marking ones Dominant as their own has fallen out of practice. To him, it seems to give a submissive more empowerment rather than less, and he’s always been in the practice of offering a ring to his Dominant (not that he’s been in the practice of having a Dominant for many years now), whether they’ve chosen to accept or not. He knows Clint can’t wear it in the field, that it’ll interfere with his grip, but Phil has to offer anyway.

The ring is small and silver, with a chip of black onyx. Phil holds it out and waits.

"Yes," Clint says softly - and thank god. Phil wouldn’t have coped with the public humiliation of a rejection there; but he knew Natasha would never set him up for that. "Will you put it on me?"

Phil does. It fits perfectly, he's made sure of that, and Clint makes a small noise in his throat when he looks at it. "Does it please you?" Phil asks.

"So much," Clint murmurs. He lifts his hand to the back of Phil's neck, finding his collar and drawing him in for a kiss. "Thank you, sweetheart," he says, wrapping his other arm around Phil's waist. "I'll treasure it."

"That's officially the sweetest thing that's ever happened in this tower," Tony announces loudly. "Damn, I want a sub now."

"Good luck telling Pepper that," Bruce says with a laugh. "She'll tell you to go find one and you'll never see her again. Still, you're right - that was goddamn adorable."

"Still never going to get into it," Natasha says. "But if all subs are as sweet as Phil, I could possibly understand."

Tony laughs. "They're not, trust me. Phil just seems to have it all going for him - badass by day, perfect sub by night. I think we all seriously missed out when Phil turned us down."

"Do you think at some point they'll remember we're here and stop talking about us?" Clint asks conversationally. Phil, hiding his face against Clint's neck, doesn't answer, and Clint chuckles softly, running a hand down his back. "Hey, you lot want to maybe stop embarrassing the hell out of my sub?"

"C'mon, assholes," Natasha says, and leads the way out of the kitchen. "Good job, Phil," she murmurs as she walks past, and Phil smiles.

Once the kitchen is empty, Phil looks up. Clint's smile is so perfectly sweet, and Phil returns it. "Sorry. Little bit much there."

"It's okay. You're still adjusting to this, I know. Public scenes definitely aren't for you then?"

Phil shakes his head. "No. But not only that..."

Clint chuckles. "Yeah, I know. I can already tell that praise is a pretty big thing for you, and a room full of Dominants talking about how sweet you are is going to be overwhelming - and bring out the possessiveness in me, I will admit."

"Good thing I'm all yours then, isn't it?"

Clint shivers a little and tightens his hold. "God yes. And they were right - you truly are the sweetest sub I've ever had the pleasure of being with."

Phil, blushing hard again, has to smile. "I can be a real brat if the mood strikes," he warns.

Clint grins. "Oh, honey, I can't wait. But that does remind me - we have to negotiate our contract pretty quickly if we need to present a copy at the review... and if we want to start play, we kind of need to know what play is for both of us. Hell, I don't even know your hard limits yet. Okay to talk tonight if we head upstairs?"

"Yes -"

Phil sighs, frustrated, and Clint strokes his hand down Phil's back. "What's wrong?"

"I don't know what to call you."

Clint smiles softly. "My name is fine for now - and you don’t have to call me anything else if you don’t want to. But if you do, I know sir and boss are out for obvious reasons, but if there's anything else you like the sound of, just suggest it."

Phil nods. He's got something in mind, but he'll wait until they're upstairs before he mentions it. "Before we go, and since we're in the kitchen, can I get you anything?” It’s a slightly awkward offer, but Phil’s just rolling with his instincts here. It’s served him well so far.

Clint looks so damn pleased with him. "So thoughtful," he praises gently, and Phil just wants to curl up and purr. "Can you make us some coffee and bring it up to my room? I have a few things I want to dig out of storage before you get there."

"Yes, Clint."

Clint kisses him softly, then lets him go. "I'll see you in a few minutes," he says.

Once he's gone, Phil focuses on making coffee. He's idly watching the pot, when Steve walks in. "Hey, Phil," he says, leaning against the counter. "Sorry if we embarrassed you."

"It's fine. Still getting used to being openly submissive - it's not like I kept it a secret, but there's a difference between knowing and seeing."

Steve nods. "For what it's worth, what we saw was really quite something. Clearly Clint is enamoured with you, and it's obvious why. I'm so glad this situation worked out well for you."

"Thank you, Steve," Phil says, smiling softly as he fills two mugs with coffee, then a third for Steve who nods his thanks. "There won't be many public displays like that - unless Clint says otherwise, of course - but I felt it was important to give my ring in similar circumstances to receiving my collar. And, though this wasn't my motivation, it also helps if any of you are called in to answer questions about our collaring ceremony, since you can honestly say you've seen affection between us. It will most likely be you, I'll give you the heads up now, because you have a reputation for trustworthiness."

"I'll give a glowing report if I'm asked," Steve promises. “I would have anyway, but it's good to not have to lie.”

Phil nods. "I appreciate it. And if you'll excuse me, I need to take this to Clint."

"Don't let me keep you."

Phil heads out, over to the lifts. He hums a little as he rides up to Clint's floor, then hesitates at the door, before eventually playing it safe and knocking. The door swings open almost immediately and Clint smiles fondly at him. "Open door policy from here on in," he says. "No need to knock."

"Thank you," Phil murmurs as he places his own mug of coffee on the table and hands Clint's to him.

"Good boy," Clint says, and that's just - oh. Phil whines and drops his forehead to Clint's shoulder, Clint chuckling softly when he does. "That's definitely a keeper, then," Clint says, rubbing Phil's back with his free hand. "I don't know whether to be thrilled that you're so receptive, or sad about how fucking praise starved you clearly are."

"Be happy," Phil murmurs. "I am."

"Okay. Can I have a kiss?"

Phil immediately lifts his head and obeys - and it feels so nice to obey, even such a simple task like this. "Are we writing our contact now?" Phil asks when Clint breaks the kiss.

"We'll start talking and negotiating." Clint gestures for him to pick up his mug, then takes his hand and leads him to the couch. "I figured since JARVIS hears everything we say, we can get him to give a summary and write our contract off that - saves us having to stop and write things down all the time. Okay with that?"

"Yes, Clint."

There's a large box sitting on the coffee table, and Phil glances at it as they sit down. "Not quite yet," Clint says, and Phil looks away, back to Clint. "Let's do some talking. You've done this before?"

Phil nods. "Not for years though."

"That's okay. It's been awhile for me too. Do you want to go by the list, or should we just do hard limits and needs upfront and go from there?"

"I can give you my definite hard limits if you wish?" Clint nods, taking his hand. "Watersports, scat, and blood play are all nonnegotiable hard limits."

"Good. Me too. When you say blood play, though, are you ruling out pain play too?"

Phil shakes his head. "Not all of it, anyway. I don't like whips and belts all that much, but if you're particularly interested then I'll give it a go."

"I'm not. Call them soft limits?"

"Okay. Floggers and paddles are good if I'm in the headspace, and that's often good if I've had a frustrating day and I need to be calmed down."

Clint nods. "Easy. I'm personally quite attached to one of my floggers, and I'd like to try out a session with that to see how you like it, if you're not completely adverse."

"I'm not. I'm open to trying quite a few things with you." Phil hesitates for a moment, hiding his uncertainty behind a mouthful of coffee. "Two more limits," he eventually says. "But they're a bit stupid."

"No such thing. Tell me?"

Phil sighs and puts his mug down, squeezing Clint's hand as he does the same. "This is more in the realm of punishment. I'll take punishment, of course, at your discretion but... I can't take a beating, and I can't handle being yelled at. If you start punching me or yelling at me, I'll start crying, and it's fucking stupid I know -"

"Shh, no, it's okay." Clint wraps his arms around him, and Phil holds on to him tight. "I won't," Clint promises. "I will never lay a fist on you in anger, or raise my voice to try and intimidate you. I don't believe in aggressive domination, and even if I did, I sure don't think you need any of it."

Phil sighs in relief. "Thank you," he whispers.

"Are you okay? Do we need to stop for awhile?"

"No. No, I'm okay, just... two minutes?"

"As long as you need, sweetheart." Clint rubs his back, slow and steady. "You don't need to talk anything out?"

Phil shakes his head. "Can we talk about it another day?”

"Of course." Clint presses a kiss to the top of his head. "I'm never going to push you to talk about any of your triggers or hard limits unless I'm afraid for your safety - if you know why they're there and you can tell me when you need to stop, that's good enough for me until you're ready to share."

Phil focuses on taking a few deep breaths, following the steady rise and fall of Clint's chest. He sits back when he's calmer, and Clint cups a hand to his cheek for a moment. "Thanks," Phil says softly, turning to press a kiss to his palm. "Could you tell me some of your hard limits?"

"Sure. You've already touched on my main ones. I don't think this will be a problem with you, but I'm not a switch - I'm an eleven, no real surprise there. I'm okay with you occasionally topping from the bottom, quite enjoy it in the right circumstances, but I'll never roleplay or actually submit."

Phil nods. "I don't want to dominate you. I'm too subby to want anything else."

"That's not a bad thing." Clint thinks for a moment. "Not so much hard limits, but I'm generally uncomfortable with public scenes - humiliation is the big one. I won’t hide that you’re my submissive, but I don’t really want to publicly dominate you unless we’re in a setting where it’s necessary; formal clubs and restaurants and the like, where you need to be at my feet. Not that I’m big on those kinds of places, to be honest.”

“Neither am I. I know how to behave at one if I need to, but I’d really prefer to be at your level if we’re in public. I won’t hide that I’m your submissive -“ Phil pauses, smiling at that, and Clint returns it. “Sorry. Won’t hide it, but I think I’ll end up projecting neutral out of habit when we’re in public or at SHIELD.”

“I can easily accept that. And when I say public, I mean outside the building; I'm a bit more okay with things happening in front of the team, if for example you need to spend some time at my feet or anything while we're all together. But I’d struggle with it at work - I’d want to get you somewhere private if that became a need during the day.”

“Works for me too. When I'm out there, I'm Agent Coulson and you're either Barton or Hawkeye, and doing anything publicly when we're those people will feel wrong. This right here is Phil and Clint, and that extends to downstairs too... though not as much, for me. I like having as much of this as possible just between me and you."

"Good. This is going easy - but then I'm not surprised. You're not much of a troublemaker are you?"

Phil shakes his head. "I brat when I'm in the mood, but I don't intentionally break rules if I've agreed with them being there. I like pleasing you."

Clint lifts a hand to the back of Phil's neck, softly stroking his collar. "Such a good boy," he murmurs, and Phil bows his head a little. "I'm so pleased with you, Phil."

"Thank you, master," Phil says, then he and Clint both freeze. "Shit. I'm sorry, I -"

Clint tucks his fingers under Phil's chin, raising his head. "Phil, sweetheart, it’s okay. You surprised me, but it’s not a bad thing. Is it what you want?"

"It's archaic and so fucking subby -"

"You need to stop using that word like it's a bad thing, okay? I like you subby. Do you know how beautiful it is that you're so submissive? How trusted you make me feel?" Phil smiles a little and Clint returns it. "If you're comfortable with master, call me master. I'd be honoured."

"Okay," Phil murmurs. “I don’t think it’ll be all the time, just when I’m… when you make me feel like - like I’m good. Um. Can we continue?"

"Of course. Punishment? I already have your hard limits, but are there any issues you'd like to bring up that might need working into punishment?"

Phil hums. "I may need some time to think on that. Haven't had anybody punish me in so long, I've developed my own methods to handle my transgressions... mostly."

"Mostly?"

"Mm. Okay, this is the only time I'll request anything like this, but I'd like to let aspects of our work life come in to punishment."

Clint frowns. "Tell me what you mean?"

"I work too hard. I know I do. I pull stupidly long hours and don't sleep enough and half the time I forget to eat or drink enough water. Things like sleep and hours worked can be regulated a lot easier, but forgetting meals is a bad habit. I'd like rules around those things, and punishment if I break them. Private punishment, of course, and not in work hours."

Clint breathes a sigh of relief. "Up until that, I thought I was going to have to work out how to say no. You're thinking of the honour system, where you come home and tell me if you obeyed and then punishment is given?" Phil nods. "That I can do. Within reason - if a portal to hell opens in the middle of the city and you miss lunch because you're too busy fighting, I won't punish you."

Phil laughs. "Thank you. And Clint?"

"Yes, dearest?"

Phil pauses. "Oh, I like that one."

"Good. I'm quite partial to it myself. What were you going to say?"

"If you need to tell me no, you can. I mean, of course you can, you're my Dom -" Phil sighs. "Don't sugar coat it, is what I'm trying to say. I can handle being told no."

"I know you can, honey," Clint says gently. "I don't want to say no to you, though. I want to give you everything you want."

Phil knows he's blushing. "You're what I want," he says. "Do you have any standing rules?"

"Hm." Clint considers it, absently stroking Phil's hair. "I won't share you," he says. "In fact, you can go ahead and class that as a hard limit - I'm your only Dom. If you want another, you end things with me first."

Clint's tone has turned sharp, and Phil does his best to calm him. "I don't see that happening. I don't want anybody but you - and I'm really glad you don't want to share me."

Clint smiles a little sheepishly. "Sorry, got a bit heated there. But I'm shockingly possessive in that regard."

"Will I have to share you?" Phil asks quietly.

"No, sweetheart, definitely not. I'm all yours." Phil smiles and Clint returns it, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. "I'm big on respect, but I don't see that being an issue with you, and I generally don’t punish for disrespect - it just disappoints me.”

“I’m fairly sure that’s the worst punishment of all,” Phil tells him. “I’ve seen your disappointed face and I’d quite like to not be the cause of that.”

Clint smiles a little. “I don’t think you will be. I'll tolerate bratting to an extent - it can be fun, especially since we already have some good banter - but I'll ask you not to push it particularly if I'm tired or just back from a mission.”

"Of course. Can I ask -?"

"I won't restrict your speech, sweet boy," Clint says. "Not unless you like that, and only ever in play. Ask away."

"The way you looked at me last night when I was kneeling - was that just because you were about to collar me, or was the kneeling itself pleasing to you?"

Clint makes an approving hum. "There's little I love more than a satisfied and happy sub at my feet. If he wants to be there, of course."

"He does," Phil says, smiling softly. "Are we on to likes now?"

"Sure, if you want. There's no real focus to this conversation, just learning more about you." Clint grins then, stroking a hand down Phil's cheek. "Tell me your favourite guilty fantasy," he says. "Hm. No, two. Sexual and non-sexual."

Phil lowers his eyes, smiling. "Your arms have always thrilled me," he says. "I want you to pin my wrists in place while you fuck me - and maybe control my breathing a little too?"

Clint groans quietly. "Fuck yes," he says. "Breath play needs a good long discussion for safety reasons, but it's definitely a thing for me - as is pinning you down. Definitely." He sighs a little. "Wish we had our contract ready so I could make that one reality."

Phil smiles. "I'm looking forward to it... though I was kind of hoping -?"

"Yes?"

"Well. Our first time. Obviously not either of our firsts or anything but I - and this isn't a necessity or anything - but I was hoping it could be... gentle?"

Clint smiles so damn beautifully. "You want me to take you nice and slow, with lots of kisses and telling you how good you are?" Phil shivers and nods, and Clint's smile grows. "With pleasure, sweetheart. And I will tell you now that I tend to go overboard with aftercare - even with a soft and sweet scene like that, I'm still going to want to hold you for awhile afterwards and make sure you're okay."

"That's not even close to a bad thing." Phil’s already pretty aware that Clint’s domination style involves being incredibly sweet, and he’s very much on board with that. It might not be what others would expect from tough, fearless, stubborn and often bratty, Clint Barton, but it fits in very well with the man Phil has grown to know and love over the years. Clint is all of the above, but he’s also loyal to a fault, and, when people have earned his trust, protects his loved ones with his life and offers them all the kindness he can give. Being sweet to his submissives really isn’t out of character at all.

"Good,” Clint says, bringing Phil out of his reverie. “Now, back to your fantasies - non-sexual?"

"I've never tried this," Phil admits, "but I've always wanted it. Nobody else ever has, could never see the appeal or didn't think I needed it or whatever, and it's not like it's nonnegotiable -"

"Phil," Clint interrupts gently. "Tell me."

"I want to kneel at your feet and have you hand feed me."

There's a moment of silence, then Clint sighs. It sounds sad. "You were denied something so simple? Even if I wasn't particularly into it - which I am, by the way, very much so - I see no reason to not let you have it when it's clearly something you want." Phil bites his lip, and Clint sighs again. "Phil, honey, I didn't want to ask so soon, not while things are going so well, but I've got to know. Have you had bad Doms?"

"Not bad. Just... ones that couldn't reconcile Agent Coulson with Phil, and decided that they clearly didn't need to give me too much care because I kill people for a living. I haven't been abused or anything."

"But you haven't been cherished," Clint says softly. "You haven't been given simple, sweet things, just because you want them or out of the joy of giving them to you." He touches Phil's cheek, soft and gentle. "I would love to hand feed you, dearest. Not only because it pleases you, but because it pleases me to see you happy and taken care of. There are so many ways I want to show you how much you mean to me - just because you can stand on your own two feet and be a complete badass in the field doesn't mean you don't deserve sweetness and care when you're at home."

And this is the other reason Phil has no problem with Clint being sweet. Phil whines quietly, reaching out for Clint who pulls him close. "That's all I've ever wanted," he says. "Being a sub doesn't mean I can't be an agent, but being an agent doesn't mean I can't be a sub. I want to come home and be looked after and - and feel like I belong to somebody."

"You do," Clint murmurs. "You're mine. I love you, Phil."

Phil shudders out a relieved breath it feels like he's been holding for years. "I love you too," he says, his voice choked up. "So fucking much, Clint, I can't even begin to tell you-"

“Shh, sweet boy," Clint says, tilting Phil's head up. "It's okay. I've got you." Clint kisses him, soft but with such power behind it that Phil melts. All the tension drains out of him, and he's lax and calm when Clint pulls away, still holding Phil in his arms. "Better?"

"Yes, master," Phil says, and doesn't even blush.

Clint hums in approval. "Good," he says softly. "That's what I like to see - you nice and settled with your needs met. Is there anything else you want to discuss tonight? Otherwise I thought I might put you to bed with a good book while I get started outlining the contract."

"You don't want me to help?"

"Yes, but tomorrow. Tomorrow morning, since you have the day off, I want you to spend a bit of time on those punishments you needed to think about, and have a list for me when I get home. Tomorrow afternoon we'll sit down again and hammer out all the details, and I hope by tomorrow night we'll have a contract we're both happy to sign. Tonight though I'm just doing the template, and as good as you are at paperwork, I want you to just relax for a bit. It's been a stressful time for you and the review is just going to stress you further. Relax while you can."

"Okay. Clint? One last thing?"

"Yeah?"

Phil’s not even sure how to bring this up. "Age play?" he asks. “Um. Where do you stand on it?”

Clint’s smile is a little uncertain around the edges. “I haven’t done it before and my immediate instinct is to say no for now - I wouldn’t say it’s a hard limit, but there are too many negative connotations for me to just jump into something like that." Phil nods in understanding - he's the one who compiled Clint's file, he knows at least a little of Clint's dysfunctional childhood. "But if it’s something you need, I'm happy to try to discuss how I can give you a safe place to do so."

"I don't know," Phil admits. "I've been curious, but never in a position to try it."

“Okay. Well, we can shelve it for now and come back to it when we’re ready. Good plan?”

“Yes, master,” Phil says, and this time he does blush but Clint doesn’t react at all, which is promising. “Is that all?”

“I think so. Let’s go to bed.”

Getting ready to go to bed with someone for just sleep is something Phil isn’t used to at all, and he admits as much as he gets changed, calling through to the bathroom where Clint’s brushing his teeth. “Even the few hookups I had over the years, they either left straight after or we both kind of passed out straight after.”

He enters the bathroom as Clint’s rinsing, and Clint grins when he’s done. “Yeah, I feel that. If it’s a release of tension, there’s really no energy left for cuddling.” He wraps an arm around Phil’s waist, tugging him close and invading his space as Phil brushes his teeth. Not that Phil's complaining. “Which is why I’m glad we’re working up to this. I like cuddling - and I like this domestic shit. Having a home together and all that.”

Phil can’t really reply, but he hopes his eyes say all that needs saying.

As they’re settling in to bed with their tablets, Phil glances at Clint, then goes for it because Clint’s said to ask questions if he has them. “What’s the ultimate perk for you about being a Dom?” he asks.

It’s always an interesting question, because it’s different for everybody. Domination and submission is personal to each individual, and what they get out of it differs vastly from person to person. For some it’s about living completely alternate lifestyles, full-time roleplay and the like; for others it can be about the power rush, the joy from receiving pain, the need for humiliation, or other much deeper and often darker reasons.

Phil doesn’t think there’s much darkness in Clint, but he’s curious all the same.

Clint contemplates it for a moment. “I like knowing that I’m making a difference in someone’s life,” he says. “‘s why I’m an Avenger and all that - what I do matters to people. It makes lives better. I like… protecting someone. Keeping them safe. Knowing that they trust me to look after them and that I make them happy. So it’s kinda the power trip but it’s not about having the power, just knowing there’s good coming from it.”

“You really are a wonderful human being,” Phil says softly.

Clint nudges him and ducks his head a little. “Shut up,” he says, and Phil tries not to laugh because some things never change and Clint taking praise is one of them. “What about you? What’s the holy grail of submissiveness?”

“Suppose it’s sort of selfish by comparison. I like being wanted. Knowing that someone wants me enough to have me as theirs, to allow me to serve them. To submit to someone, to their wishes and desires, to be given orders and told that I please them -”

And now Phil’s the one blushing but Clint looks actually pleased by what he’s said. “There’s nothing wrong with that, Phil,” he says. “Pure submission for the sheer joy of submitting is a great thing, at least from my perspective.”

"I’m glad to hear that." Clint smiles, soft and sweet, and Phil returns it. "I can't remember the last time I was this content," he admits.

"I've never seen you smile this freely. It's wonderful." Clint kisses him softly. "Do you want to read for awhile? I haven't got any books that you'd like, but you've got Kindle on that haven't you?"

"Yeah. Might do... oh, hang on. Clint?"

"Yes, beautiful?"

Phil stops. "Really?"

"Is that a question of whether I'm using that as a pet name, or whether I think you're beautiful? Because the answer is yes to both."

Phil ducks his head a little, blushing. "Thank you. You brought the box in but never opened it. Is it not for now?"

"Oh, right. I forgot about that. Can you go grab it for me please?"

Phil goes back to the other room and picks it up. It's not too heavy, and a few things rattle as he carries it back in, giving Phil a bit of an idea of what might be inside. "Is this your play box?" he asks as he sets it on the end of the bed.

Clint smiles. "Open it up and find out."

Phil does. He glances in at the assortment of toys, and smiles too. "I have a collection of my own," he says as Clint joins him at the end of the bed. "Nowhere near as extensive though."

Clint laughs a little sheepishly. "Yeah. Again, the whole freedom to buy what I wanted thing - I've played with some of this, casual one-night things over the years, but a lot of it is still unused and bought out of hope more than need. Want to go through it or want me to show you?"

"Can you show me? Which one is your favourite?"

Clint grins, and digs out a flogger. It's braided leather, four strands with small knots at the ends, and Clint rests it on his hand. "This baby makes beautiful patterns," Clint says. "It's much more of a gentle pain too, so I've heard. Interested?”

“In moderation - I have to tell you, I can't do extended pain sessions. I like the sting and the heat, but not a great deal further. Too much pain takes me right out the other side of subspace, often into distress."

"That's okay. Ten lashes of this is more than enough to bring up some beautiful marks and hopefully have you nice and pliant." Clint strokes one of the knots, then puts it aside. He brings out three other standard floggers and two paddles, and puts them all together. "Nothing too violent," he says as Phil looks them over. "No whips, no canes, and I've never even used a riding crop."

"I have."

"Yeah?" Phil pulls a face. "Okay, no. Too intense?"

"Just no pleasure. I can endure the pain if there's something good in it, but that did nothing for me. Whereas these -" Phil strokes a finger over one of the paddles, "- these are just the right kind of impact play. Good for play and punishment."

"This was meant to be, wasn't it?" Phil raises an eyebrow, and Clint blushes. "Okay, shit, no, sorry. I'm not one of those 'fated soulmates' types, I swear... but we're seriously fucking compatible, Phil."

"I know. I didn't want to mention it in case you thought I was one of those types too."

Clint laughs softly. "Well, whatever it is, we're going to have a lot of fun together."

"Not just fun, though?" Phil has to ask, a little hesitant.

"No, sweetheart," Clint says fondly. "This is definitely about more than this box - I'm going to look after you in every way you want me to."

"Thanks. Sorry, I do know that."

"I know you do. I think we both need a bit of assurance at the moment that this is real." Phil smiles and Clint returns it, then frowns as he looks back in the box. "Hm. Here's a whole area we didn't discuss."

Clint lifts up a blindfold. "Right," Phil says. "Sensory deprivation." He holds out a hand for the blindfold, stroking the soft silk. "I like this, but I've got to know that you're in the room. That said, I love playing with that - as long as you're in the room somewhere, I like trying to figure out where exactly you are."

Clint grins. "Since I'm top 2% for stealth at SHIELD, I think we can have a lot of fun with that."

"Definitely." Phil puts the blindfold aside. "Earplugs do nothing for me. Gags are... good. Sometimes. They're nice to take pressure off, but I hate being fucked when I'm in one."

"Nonsexual only," Clint says with a nod. "Got it." He delves back into the box and brings back a set of clamps. He wrinkles his nose a little, then looks up at Phil. "Thoughts?"

"Not adverse, but not elated. Happy to leave them out, especially when you look so unimpressed."

"Yeah." Clint tosses them in the bin. "Bad memories more than anything."

Phil brushes his hand over Clint's, then laces their fingers together. "Want to tell me?"

"Sure. Hooked up for a casual arrangement with a sub last year - one of those weekend things. He told me straight off the bat that he was in this for a good pain play session, and we stopped in to pick up some toys on the way. Whips, irons and manacles, clamps, clothespins, cables..."

Clint shudders, and Phil winces, squeezing his hand. "Bad time?"

"Okay at first. We started out at what I'd consider a good level - floggers, paddles, handcuffs. Except for me that's about where I'd call it a night; for him it was base level. By the second day he was bruised and battered and still screaming for more. I... I safeworded out."

"Good," Phil says softly, and Clint frowns. "Good that you used your safeword," he elaborates. "I'm glad you know your limits and where to call it. That makes me feel safer."

Clint smiles. "I'll call it, don't worry." His eyes widen then, and he groans. "Jesus christ, Phil. We haven't even talked safewords."

Phil just shrugs. "I knew you wouldn't let me go into a scene without one. I was taught on the colour system, so we can stick with that for now as a default until we talk about what we both need for that kind of situation. Discussion for another night?"

"Sounds good to me."

Phil lifts Clint's hand and kisses it, receiving a smile in response. "Anything else in that box you need to get rid of from that weekend?"

"Let me check."

Clint rummages through, then pulls a truly impressive face and draws out an electrical cord. "Oh my god, no," Phil says immediately. "I've been electrocuted, I am not doing that shit in the bedroom."

"Wouldn't do it to you if you begged," Clint says and bins it. "Nothing else, I don't think. We're at the dregs now - tape, rope, handcuffs... handcuffs?"

"What kind?" Clint pulls out a metal set and Phil shrugs. "Sure." But when Clint then lifts out a beautiful set of leather wrist cuffs, connected with a detachable metal bar, Phil's breath catches in his throat. "Oh," he whispers.

Clint smiles. "Despite your fantasy, we somehow completely skipped talking about wrist restraints. That's a yes?"

"A huge yes."

"Good. Hold out your wrists." Phil does, and Clint gently affixes each cuff. "How are they?"

Phil hums and closes his eyes. "Good," he murmurs.

"Yeah?" Phil isn't sure whether he needs to reply, and anyway things just feel too nice and good and right to bother with words. So he just hums again, smiling softly, and a moment later Clint laughs in surprise and delight. "Oh my god, you're going under. It's that easy?"

Phil opens his eyes, trying to focus. "Sorry."

"Shh, no, honey, don't fight it. It's okay - it's great, actually. Here, lie down." Clint helps him lie back, Phil instinctively raising his bound arms above his head. "Oh, look at you," Clint murmurs softly. "So beautiful. I'll have to order you a set that we can attach you to the headboard with."

"Don't tease me with that thought," Phil murmurs.

"I'm absolutely not teasing; I'm promising. This is just my standard play kit, but you'd better believe I'm buying you custom sets."

"These aren't custom?"

"Well, yeah. But who says you can only have one set?" Phil smiles, and Clint kisses his forehead. "I'm going to buy you so many things, my love."

"Can't argue with that."

"I don't think you can do much at the moment," Clint says, and it sounds like he's smiling. "You just relax. I'll get all of this cleared away."

Phil settles in and lets the comfortable blankness fill his mind. He's not in subspace, not quite, but he's content and safe and really quite happy to lie here and not think about much, just listen to the quiet sounds of Clint packing up the box and know that his Dom is here.

After a bit, Clint returns to the bed, sitting next to him with his back against the headboard. Phil lowers his arms and rolls to the side a little, turning his head so he can see Clint, who smiles fondly at him. "Happy?" he asks, and Phil nods. "Good. I won't keep you like that for much longer - mainly because you're such a beautiful temptation right now and we haven't signed our contact."

"If you want to, I won't argue," Phil murmurs. "I trust you."

"I know - and that's why I won't do anything until we have a contract." Clint threads a hand into Phil's hair, scratching his nails gently across his scalp. "I want to get as many things right with you as I possibly can. There'll be mistakes and miscommunications and it won't always be wonderful, and that's because we're both human. But I'm going to do my best to have you as happy and well-kept as I can - which starts, sadly, with me taking those off you before you actually go right under."

Phil opens his eyes with effort. "It's the hair," he says. "Such a weak spot."

"Mm, I can tell." Clint removes his hand from Phil's hair, and Phil barely keeps from whining as the cuffs come off. "Contract tomorrow," he tells Phil as he gets up to put them away. "Then they're yours to wear as much as you like."

Phil yawns. "I'll hold you to that."

Clint returns to bed, lies down next to him, and holds out his arms. "We'll just have to make do with cuddling until tomorrow."

"Not complaining about that one bit," Phil informs him, and lets Clint wrap him up in his arms.

***

Once all of the discussions and negotiations are out of the way (at least for now - Phil knows that they'll always be discussing and negotiating as all healthy relationships should), the contract is drawn up the following afternoon. Phil writes most of the legalese, very tentatively corrects Clint's spelling errors, and runs it by the standard lists for general contracts. He leaves Clint to read it over while Phil goes to get dinner - hovering over Clint while he's reading always makes him nervous - and by the time Phil's returned and they've discussed a few more minute details over dinner, it all seems good to go.

Clint calls in Tony to witness, mainly because he's the first to respond when a general inquiry goes out, and Tony skims over the contract briefly before pronouncing it fine. Any arguments he had wouldn't be enough to halt the process, but as a neutral third party he's able to catch anything that might be worded in a problematic way that the others haven't spotted. Not so much an issue for detail-oriented Phil and ever-cautious-when-signing-paperwork Clint, but for couples writing contracts in the honeymoon phase it can sometimes lead to loopholes and other problems with the contract down the line.

Again, not an issue. Phil knows that any problems arising later on in their relationship will be resolved through the same good communication and care they've shown in the first few days. This is Clint, after all, and Phil trusts Clint with his whole damn life.

Which is probably why, when handed a pen and asked if he's ready to sign, Phil pauses then shakes his head.

"Something wrong?" Clint asks. "If you've caught another spelling mistake, you can tell me. I won't be annoyed."

Phil smiles a little. "It's all fine. Perfect, actually. Which is why I was wondering if you wanted to recollar me before we sign."

Clint frowns, and Phil understands his confusion. Recollaring usually only happens on milestone anniversaries, as a renewing of vows, or if the relationship has gone through an upheaval of some sort and needs take a different path to the original vows. "Is this something you want or something you think I want?" Clint asks.

"I'm not sure if it's either, to be honest. It's just the vows I'm worried about - because I picked those when I thought this wasn't going to be real, and they're... they don't say how I feel. I chose the ones that wouldn't bind us to strict obedience or affection or anything more than basically a business transaction and I know the whole 'drastically different direction' thing doesn't normally happen in the first two days, but doesn't this kind of qualify?"

Clint just looks at him for a moment. "What were your vows to me, Phil?" he asks.

Phil tries to remember. "To accept you as my Dominant, to honor and respect you, to always strive to act according to your wishes -"

Clint shakes his head. "No. What were your vows to me, Phil?"

After a moment, Phil smiles. "Gladly and freely," he says.

Clint returns the smile. "I don't need anything more than that to know that you're mine," he says. "If you want proper formal vows later on down the track, I'm happy to discuss a recollaring, but those words are where I want us to be right now - gladly and freely going into this. Because we could have so easily not been, and I never want you to forget that those words are all I bind you under; being here, gladly and freely. Okay?"

"Okay," Phil murmurs, and for a long moment there's silence as they smile at each other, soft and ridiculously happy.

Then Tony clears his throat. "Touching and all," he says, "but I do have technology to dismantle tonight, so if you wouldn't mind hurrying it along?"

"It would be Tony here to ruin the moment," Clint mutters. "Ready to sign, sweetheart?"

"Definitely." And without hesitation, Phil signs on the dotted line.

Clint does the same, and then slips an arm around him as Tony signs as the witness. "Thanks, Tony," Clint says. "Now leave."

"Isn't there normally cake at these things?"

"Contract signings? I don't know what fancy shindigs you're used to, but I'm not in the habit of providing cake." Clint's amused smile suddenly takes on a wicked tilt and he raises an eyebrow at Tony. "I don't think you'd want to stick around anyway. I've just gotten full permission to engage in play with my submissive, and you saw what kinds of things were on the approved -"

"Gotta go, congrats, enjoy your night - not too much!"

The door slams shut behind him and Phil laughs. "And now we know how to get rid of Tony."

He turns to Clint, then stops. Clint's looking down at the contract, fingers hovering over Phil's signature. His other hand is to his neck, touching the leather necklace Phil gave him - the one that holds his ring. When he looks up, his smile is amazing. "You really are mine," he says.

"I'm yours," Phil agrees. "For as long as you'll have me."

"Forever, then." Clint looks at him as of seeing him for the first time. "My Phil," he says softly. "My sweet boy."

Phil makes a quiet needy sound and draws as close to Clint as possible. "Always," he says.

"Will you let me take you to bed?" Clint asks. "Despite my comments to Tony, I do plan on keeping my promise - soft and sweet and telling you how much I love you."

Phil shivers a little. "It's been a long time since I've been loved," he says quietly.

"No it hasn't," Clint says just as softly. "You've been loved for a very long time - I was just never brave enough to show it."

"Show me now?"

Clint takes his hands and draws him out of his seat, pressing a gentle kiss to Phil's lips before leading him to the bedroom.

***

It's soft. It's sweet. It's beautiful.

And it's the start of so much more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that’s it for fic #1! I’m hoping to keep in the habit of posting weekly, so you should see the next fic in this series up in a week.


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